Night at the Auction

As my brother-in-law James and I walked through the door of the action house, every head turned and stared.  I don't know if it was James' extreme height (6 foot 7 inches), or my bright purple coat that attracted everyone's attention, but it was clear to us that we were not of the usual crowd.  Both being auction newbies, we stood at the door for a moment scanning for a place to stand.  As the stares became uncomfortable, we moved about the crowded room, prying eyes moving with us. 

Once settled in the small space between desks, we listened to the auctioneer's chant.  He spoke a mile a minute, calling out lot numbers and bids at his rapid speed.  It took a few minutes (and the help of many viewing hours of Storage Wars), but eventually we began to understand and decipher the calls.  We quickly perused the merchandise we were interested in, picked up our ballot, and waited.

With the impending arrival of Grandpa and Grandma McLean to the neighborhood, we were in need of some items to finish furnishing their apartment.  A kitchen table and chairs was on top of the list, and there were three different sets that we were interested in.  There was a black table, a round table, and an oval table.  James and I decided that we had a $150 limit, that our preferences were first round, then oval, then black, and that, despite preference, we would bid on any of the tables just as long as we got one.

As it was, the oval table was first up to bid.  The auctioneer started it at $100.  No takers. $90? $80?  Still no one.  My heart started beating like crazy.  No one wanted this table?  $70? $60?  My nerves were getting to me.  $50? $40?  Still no takers and I couldn't take it anymore. $30 and my yellow ballot shot up.  Could he get $40, could he get $35?  I was prepared to bid again but it wasn't needed as NO ONE bid against me.  $30 once, $30 twice, SOLD for $30. We won the table uncontested and for only 30 Dollars!  My racing heart couldn't believe it.  It was unreal.

James and I each squealed and high-fived.  We had won the table far below our max budget.  Because of our good luck, James decided that he might try to win onc of the subsequent tables for his own apartment.  As the bidding on the remaining tables commenced, we felt justified in our purchase, as the black table sold for over $100 and the round table, our first choice, sold for $350.  We don't know how we lucked out with only paying $30 when the other tables sold for so much more.  It was definitely a blessing and a miracle!

We hung around for a little bit longer, waiting to see what other goods we could score.  Eventually we decided to call it a day so we could go meet Grandma and Grandpa as they arrived.  As we stood in line waiting to pay, the second to last item of the evening was up for bid: a set of three matching lamps.  Lamps were something that was also needed, so I shouted a bid from the back of the room--$5! This time there was a small bidding war but lucky for us, we topped out at $15 and the lamps were ours.  

After paying the buyers fees and taxes, we ended up paying $55.81 total for the lamps, table, and chairs.  What a steal!  Even as a novice, it was a good day at the auction.  It was an exciting and inexpensive way to be able to help out Grandma and Grandpa and a great way to furnish a house or apartment.  And the best part?  It was just plain fun! 

The Bag Lady

I often walk to and from the grocery store.  This can be a challenge when my brain gets so involved in buying things and getting good deals that it forgets I have to WALK HOME with all my buys.  The store isn't far (three blocks over and three blocks down), but when you are toting bags full of food and laundry detergent, it's a long and tiresome walk.

Yesterday, there was a $1 sale going on.  $1 for some awesome stuff.  I had to go shopping.  Taking a tip from my neighbor, I decided to take my three regular reusable bags plus a backpack.  Why carry weight in your arms when you can carry it on your back?  I had never taken a backpack before but thought that yesterday was the day to bring out the big guns.  This particular backpack is an old one of Keith's.  It is definitely a boy's backpack, with multiple pockets, zippers, straps, and buckles.  I felt a little awkward wearing it to the store, as it is so bulky and big that it felt like it was wearing me.

I had a great time shopping.  I bought 39 items for $63 (a block of cheese and jar of honey threw off a better total), and I will get $5 back in rebates.  Not too shabby.  I pulled out my bags and started packing.  I stuffed the backpack full of heavy bottled, canned, and cold items, used a bag for boxes (cake mixes for a $1?  You bet!  Especially when the regular price is $3), another bag for items sold in bags (off-brand cereal and snacks), and the third for produce.  I slung my backpack on my back, threw the bags in my arms, and headed out.

I had only taken a few steps when I realized there was a flaw in my thinking.  Because of the straps on the backpack, I was unable to put my grocery bags on my shoulders.  These bags were too heavy to carry all three in my arms, so I needed to do something.  I stopped and put down my backpack.  Looking it over, I found a buckled strap on the side, used to expand the body.  I opened it and clipped one of my grocery bags in.  I swung the backpack back up and started walking again, only now I had two bags in my arms and one swinging from the backpack behind me.  It was working.

I went about a block and a half before I decided I needed to make another change.  The produce bag was so heavy, that I couldn't hold it plus the other bag comfortably.  I carefully took off my backpack and gave it another look.  There, hidden behind a zippered pocket was a random velcroed strap on the other side.  I have no idea what it was intended for, but it was perfect for me.  I locked the second bag through the straps and started walking again.

With each step I took I felt more and more ridiculous, and I'm fairly certain I looked ridiculous too.  I only had one bag in my hands, with the other two hanging and swinging wildly from the backpack behind me. Step with my right, a bag would hit me in the rump.  Take a step with my left, a cake box would jab me in the thigh.  Luckily, traffic on the road home was sparse, but I couldn't help thinking what other people were thinking when they saw me:  Crazy Lady!  I wish I could have taken a picture of myself.  What a sight!

By the time I got home, I was exhausted.  I have no idea how much my groceries weighed, but after I dropped my backpack and its attachments in the kitchen, I had a hard time walking through to the living room.  I felt like I was going to tip over forwards, due to having compensated for the weight of the bags.

Next time I go shopping, I think I'll scrap the backpack and take a large suitcase instead.  That way I can just roll my groceries home.

The Price is Right, or Isn't

Last Saturday I went shopping.  I bought 3 undershirts, 2 sweaters, 1 blouse, 2 t-shirts and 1 pair of shoes.  With sales, discounts, coupons and gift cards, I paid less than $50 dollars.  Clothes to last me a while.

Today I ordered my graduation package.  It includes 1 billowy gown , 1 cardboard hat, 1 tassel, and 1 white strip of school insignia.  There were no sales or discounts, neither were there coupons or gift cards, and it cost me over $70 with shipping.  An outfit to last me an hour. 

I hate it when I can't buy things cheap.

Hangover

I blinked my eyes and opened them the merest slit, peering into the total darkness.  Good, I thought, it isn't morning yet.  I can go back to sleep.  But then the phone rang and there was an unusual amount of noise and voices coming from upstairs for the middle of the night.  And I really didn't remember ever getting ready for bed.  Realization then came--it wasn't the middle of the night, it was the middle of the evening, and I had fallen asleep.  Fall asleep, that is, for five whole hours.  And as I checked the time and saw that I had slept through the afternoon and evening and that it was now 9:00 at night, I had only one thought in mind: Curse that Black Friday.

It's true.  Even after all our complaints against the day, and our swearing last year to never again participate, we once again were caught in the current of commercialism, and we once again shopped to the death on Black Friday. 

We left the house at approximately 11:00 Thanksgiving evening, returned home at 2:40 the next morning, and were out again before 6:00.  We shopped the night and into the morning away.  We stood in check-out lines near to hours, we were pushed and shoved, we shared stories and tales of battle wounds from wars in years past, and we survived.

Looking back at the purchases our fury and extreme tiredness bought, it probably wasn't worth the blood, sweat, and tears (literally), and somethings may be going back, but the experience was exhilarating. 

Exhilarating, that is, until you crash at 4:00 that afternoon.

It Runs in the Family

Some people (read 'Keith') think I have an obsession with shopping.  It isn't true.  Yes, shopping is fun, and I do it often, and spending money can make one feel better, but I hardly think I have an addiction.  I can quit anytime I want.

Anyway, last week we had these Kohl's coupons (remember Dumpster Diving?).  Well, when we went to use our coupons, if we spent more than $20 at check out, the machine would print out an additional $10 savings for this week.  What a deal!!

So tonight my mom and I headed back to Kohl's to use our bonus $10 coupons.  As we walked toward the store entrance, my brother-in-law walked out.  As we stepped inside, there were my sister and two of her kids.  And as we progressed through the store, we bumped into one more sister and one more brother-in-law.  All of us at the store on a Thursday evening.  All of us using our extra $10 savings. 

What can I say?  It must be in the genes.

Dumpster Diving Divas

My family went to the zoo once.  I don't remember how old I was, probably 9 or 10, but I remember the day itself fairly well.  The day was hot and the asphalt was sticky.  It was crowded, it was smelly, it was summer.

I think what made the day so memorable was that my mom, who was and still is very interested in saving money, kept fishing Kodak film packages out of the numerous garbage cans around the park.  Apparently there was a big refund for the UPCs, and my mom was taking advantage of the free supply.  I was so embarrassed!  My mom was digging through the garbage at the zoo!  And she compiled quite the collection, too, as she dodge ketchup splats and chewing gum.  We laugh about the experience now, but at the time I was mortified.  And disgusted--that garbage was gross.

Today, I noticed that the newspaper had a Kohl's coupon attached to the front of it.  $10 off of $20 is hard to pass up.  I swiped my ID card and retrieved my free papers.  I pulled off the coupons and went to throw the unneeded papers in the adjacent garbage-can-sized recycle bin.  As I opened the lid, I paused.  There on top was a stack of Salt Lake Tribunes, all new, all unread, and all with a coupon.  Holding up the large lid with one hand, I bent my top half into the big bin and used my free hand to snag the coupons and dig deeper for other hidden treasures. With my bum in the air and most of me in a giant green bin, I must have been quite the sight.

In all, I acquired 10 Kohl's coupons, most of which I gained from the waste paper basket.  It was a good, but not great effort.  You see, this wasn't my first time with my head first in the bin...  But with 10 coupons in hand, I'm going to have some great shopping.  All thanks to digging through the trash.

Like mother, like daughter, I guess.

(I may seem crazy, but at least my garbage was clean.  And recyclable.)

The Price of a Chilly Autumn

There is snow on the ground in Salt Lake this morning.  The city looked beautiful as I drove in, with the white world juxtaposed against the steel gray of the storm clouds.  But it is a bit depressing:  I don't really like snow.

In response to the weather, I'm wearing a new sweater I bought at Old Navy's end of season sale last spring.  If I remember correctly, I paid some ridiculous amount for it, something like $2.50.  That thought alone makes me not mind the snow quite so much.

***

I went to Kohl's on Monday.  Thanks to their $10 off of $20 coupon they stuck on my newspaper, my 20% off discount for having a Kohl's card, and 80% off clearance aisles, I bought $100 worth of merchandise for only $11.  Sweet!

When I told Keith of my Kohl's adventure, he said, "I just don't get it; you love to shop but you hate to spend money."  Smart kid.  One of the many reasons why I like him. :)

***

For some reason I have cold air blowing on me as I sit here at my computer.  Seriously, people!  There is snow outside.  Turn on the heat; I'm shivering in my two buck sweater.

Drowning in a Sea of Femininity

I went to Ladies' Night at Deseret Book on Saturday.  I went early.  I went alone.  And I want never to do it again.

But I was on a mission:  To buy a book at the 20% off special Ladies' Night price.

I should have gone earlier and forgotten about the 6:00-8:00pm only specials.  I should have forgone the 20% and just sufficed with the advertised 15% off.  But you know me and you know my family, and you know that we have to get the best deal or no deal at all. 

Pride: it hurts sometimes.

My goal was to load up my basket, find enough product for my $10 off $50 coupon, take advantage of the 20% off deal, and be in line and at the cash register at 6:00 when the sale started. 

If only it were so easy.

I walked into the store at about 5:40.  The place was already abuzz with women, but nothing I couldn't handle.  At the door I was handed a catalog brochure with the number 80 on it.  I placed my name in the drawing, and went about my shopping. 

David Osmond, the only Y chromosome in the vicinity, was singing at the rear of the store, middle-aged women swooning at his feet (seriously, they were eating his lame jokes up), and there was excited chatter all around me.

It took me a while to find $50 worth of worth-while merchandise.  I'm a little picky about my books, and if I'm going to spend money, it better be good.  I went from the clearance aisle to the children's, to the young adult, back to the clearance, to the inspirational, back to the young adult, back to clearance, to the middle readers, to the scripture marking stuff, back to clearance, back to young adult, to clearance once more, and I was ready for checkout. 

Unfortunately, in my indecision I had failed to notice the enormity of the newly arrived customers.  Here it was 6:08, and the store was packed.  Women were everywhere, as were children, baby carriers, strollers, and scurrying workers.  The aisles were masses of females swaying to Jessie Clark Funk, who had taken over for David at 6:00, once men were no longer welcome.  The checkout line now wound down the center aisle to the back of the store and around the corner.  Yikes.

I waded through the vast sea, again scanning the young adult section as I walked past (I grabbed a Robin McKinley on my way--love her!), and went to the very back of the line. 

The line moved slowly.  Jessie was singing some groovy Aretha Franklin medley, which made the wait slightly more tolerable, but as it was I was hungry, I was tired, and I was sweaty.  Do you know how warm it gets in a 1000-square foot store when there are 250 women and children crammed into it?  Hot, I tell you, and the air conditioning was not helping.

6:25 and my upper lip was beading.  But relief is in sight: I can feel a stream of air from the a/c and I am five people from the front of the line.  And just then I heard my name.  Miraculously, I had won a drawing, a free book and Afterglow CD.  Sweet!  It made the sweat and time almost worth it.  Almost.  The ladies behind me were kind enough to hold my place as I went to claim my prize.  I had to forge my way back to the back of the store, but this time it was as victor.

Back in line, I finally made it up to the register.  I pulled my merchandise, my coupon, and my brochure (for a free door prize for being one of the first 100) out of my basket , and set it all on the counter.  The girl rang up my purchases and gave me the total.

"$52.43", she says.

But that can't be right, I reply.  I had done the math (another reason it took me so long to shop), and my total should have only come to $43 with all the discounts in the end.  "Did you take off the coupon?"

She fiddled around for a minute and got the total down to $51.14.  It was as low as it was going to go.

The women started crushing in.  I could feel them breathing down my neck.  I was taking too much time.  I handed over my credit card. 

Later as I looked at my receipt, it showed the 20% discount was invalid because of my other coupon offers, specifically the $10 off of $50.  It took the coupon, but not the discount.  I had planned on that 20%.  In fact, that's the whole reason I had gone during Ladies' Night, otherwise I would have avoided it like the plague. 

Pointless.  I had fought a war of women for nothing.

In the end, I didn't feel too bad.  I did come home with a free book, CD, and door prize. 

But I also had sweaty hands and rings around my armpits.

Was it worth it?

The Pork Paradox

Tonight at the store I was in line behind a man wearing an Aidells Gourmet Sausage company shirt whose entire purchase consisted of two packages of Hillshire Farm Lit'l Smokies. 

Does anyone else find that ironic?

If the Shoe Fits...or Doesn't...

I have a love/hate relationship with new shoes.  It just seems that new shoes, without exception, never seem to fit quite as right at home as they did in the store.  They end up being either too big or too small.  They rub holes in my heels, fall off my feet, or pinch my little toes, and it isn't very comfortable

Today I am wearing new shoes.  Black flats with little flowers pinned along the side.  They are stinking cute, and as I was in need of new black flats, I couldn't pass them up.  (I couldn't pass up a second pair in silver, either.)  But they just don't fit right.  They're too big and keep flopping off my feet.  And in an attempt to make them stay on, I try to modify the way I walk, but I end up just looking like I have problems.  Which I do.  With my shoes.

Maybe if my feet were the same size to begin with (instead of my right being slightly bigger than my left), I wouldn't have such problems.

Maybe if the store didn't strap both shoes together and pin on anti-theft devices, I would have been able to determine if they actually fit before I bought them.

Maybe if I hadn't been shopping late on a very hot summer afternoon, my feet wouldn't have been as swollen and I could have foregone the 'wide'.

Maybe I'm just destined to never have shoes that fit just right.

Maybe.

Good thing I brought flip flops as backup.

Lotion Commotion

On Saturday I purchased $33.00 worth of Aveeno lotion.  Why? 

Because of this:

$33.00     (Purchase Price)

-    $4         (Manufacturer's coupons)

-    $5         (Store coupon)

-    $10     (Store Gift Card/Rebate)

-    $5         (Bonus Store Gift Card/Rebate)

-    $10     (Mail-in Manufacturer's Rebate)

----------

$1.00       That they pay me. 

Yeah, I like it like that.

And then I bought $4 shoes that sparkle.

It was a good shopping day.

Who Said You Can't Have It All?

I bought my first pair of Dr. Marten's today--

and they only cost $12.99 before tax.

It's like my 8th grade dream come true!

And if you were wondering,

I now have the subscription and the shoes.

(Read this).

Bidder's Remorse

In less than 10 minutes I bid on 3 items.
It's an addiction.
Help!

Sale-ing Free

They had a featurette on "Good Morning America" about 2 ladies who, to save money, started shopping sales and using coupons. They feel they have done so well, that they have started workshops teaching others how to save on the grocery bill. They charge people $25 bucks per workshop.

No wonder they feel like they're saving money; they are robbing people blind.

If you really want to learn how to save, ask my mom. She'll teach you for FREE!


She might not get paid $6.29 for buying $367.49 worth of groceries, but she's pretty darn good.

Made Rite

By the time I got to work this morning, my knee-highs looked more like shredded beef than stockings. I somehow managed to put HUGE holes in both socks before I even made it to the bus stop.

Lucky for me, there is a small Rite Aid with gas station prices just across the street from my office. A short walk and 50 cents later, I'm a brand new woman!
Phew!!! It was a close one.

A Christmas Present for Me!

Isn't it wonderful when, after paying tithing, tuition, and buying Christmas, something that you really need but don't have the money for rings up 75% off instead of the 25% you thought?

It's a Miracle.

Merry Christmas!

The Damage

Black Friday has come and gone. The damage? Only a mere

$138.48--

not as bad as last year.

Christmas is coming together nicely.

Too bad I buy as much for myself as I do for others.

Seven Days and Counting

In less than one week's time, the greatest shopping day of the year will be upon us. No other day are the stores open so early, the merchandise so hot, the lines so long, the cash flow so steady, the prices so low, or the shoppers so feisty as they are on

BLACK FRIDAY.

Bring it on.