Saturday, March 10, 2012

How To Succeed Without Really Trying

Today I had to take a big test.  As it went better than I had planned, I decided I would share my 10-step plan to having a successful examination.
  1. Wake up before your alarm, because you don't want to be too rested.
  2. Start the calisthenics.  Run around your bed a few times as you try to find a tissue to kill the bug on your floor.
  3. Next, jump in the shower and do NOT shave your legs, even though it's been awhile (think Samson).
  4. Eat the Breakfast of Champions: left over Chinese takeout.
  5. After breakfast, warm up your fingers by checking out facebook.
  6. Get your pencils ready, all three of them, because they make you bring your own.  Be sure to double check the erasers.
  7. Don't bother getting any last minute study in.   It's no use trying to cram because you can only retain so much information.
  8. Leave before you have to and then drive really slow to the testing center so that you don't arrive too early.
  9. Wait until they say "go" and then get to work.  Finish 3 minutes before they call time so that you can at least say you finished early.
  10. Because you have worked so hard, buy yourself a winter melon tea with milk and tapioca pearls--a delicacy you've been missing since your days in Taiwan--as a reward. 
So, there you have it.  You can now ace any test thrown your way. 

And when you reach step #10, call me.


Erin said...

Where did you get a winter melon tea with zhen zhu's. I want one! I'm glad that you did well on your test.

Jennie said...

You are the funniest! Glad it went well.